Letter to Mr Andrew Langton from Cairo dated 20 February 1927

Dear Langers,

How are you old chum. How's the old homestead? How's that wonderful girl of yours? Wish I could find one as sporting as her. There aren't many women who would follow a chap round the world and settle down with him in the middle of the African jungle. Of course having a large ranch, pots of money and a domestic entourage that the Prince of Wales would be proud of must have eased the upheaval I shouldn't wonder.

Still, I'm now settled down myself in my new caper. Papa has been more than extraordinarily generous with my allowance in the hope that I will get my head down and end my studies with some sort of degree or doctorate thingy. I've found a nice shack to bed down in. I say shack, it's actually more like living quarters with a small warehouse. Actually, I say small warehouse, it's more like a Hugh warehouse with a camp bed on the upper level; the sort of place a chap could set up a small venture and make a tidy profit into the bargain. Egyptian trinkets and souvenirs would go down a bomb in London don't you think? Don't let on to Papa though or he'll slash my allowance and that would be a real bore. He seems to be obsessed with the idea that I will just fritter my time and money away on gambling and drink rather than completing my studies. I've told him on many an occasion that you can't rush archeology and that it's not unusual for studies to take years. He said that if I wasn't careful my thesis would become an archeological artefact. Trouble is, he wants to see the fruits of my labour at the end of the summer so I have actually got to knuckle down and actually produce something. He's also in contact with my tutor which is not good news.

Anyway, I hope everything's working out for you. Why don't you both come up and visit me. It's not quite as palatial as your place but it's quite spacious so I'm sure but I can sort something out for you.

All the best,

Jack.

Letter dated 16 February 1927, Cairo

Dear Papa,

Thank you for the letter and the rather generous package that accompanied it. The cigars were welcome and the large bottle of Islay Single malt was very welcome. The evening tipples here are desperately difficult to find and rougher than a goat's tongue, though it has to be said, the goats quite like it.

You may rest assured now, that I have found more suitable lodgings in which to conduct my studies. The place in question has its own front door and by that I don't mean a doorway that I do not share with anyone else, although that is certainly the case. I mean a proper front door with wood, handles and even a working lock. This is something of s relief after my last place where I had to take all my belongings with me whenever I went out, even to buy some bread. On one occasion, I discovered that in my absence, someone had stolen my room. Not physically of course. That would have been a very witless and pointless crime to attempt. No, some chap, had been walking past, saw the place was empty and thought, I'll have that. It was only went I brought round the landlord that he decided to leave. Not surprising really when you consider that the landlord looks like King Kong's bigger and rather less attractive brother.

Tomorrow, I will be meeting my tutor at the museum, so I hope to be able to start my studies and get down to some hard work which is of course why you are giving me surcharge hefty allowance; so that I don't have to support myself with supplementary income. In fact I'll be working so hard, I doubt I will even set foot outside my rooms on most evenings.

Hope everyone is alright at home. Auntie for some strange reason has sent me a couple of bottles of wine to follow the package she sent a week ago. You don't know what the old girl's up to do you? She doesn't converse with me for ten years whilst I live only a half a mile away and then as soon as I leave the country, she showers me with letters and gifts. I know you shouldn't look a gift horse in the mouth but what if the crazy old nag looks shifty, has huge buck teeth and looks about to bite? Surely you would regard it with deep suspicion wouldn't you. Can you see if you can charm Mama into spilling the beans and telling you what's going on. The two of them are always in it together.

Anyway, must dash, all the best Papa. Write soon.

Your loving son Jack.

Letter Dated 10th February 1927, Cairo

Dear Mama,

I have finally arrived. The journey was relatively uneventful by air and sea. Only when it came to land did problems arise. Even your patented peppermint and lemon scented oil could not blot out the all pervading, full nasal assault that is camel aroma. It is difficult to put into words the full extent of the fetid pungency which hit me like a wall when we reached our transport to the city. Harder still was to ascertain which part of the animal, the smell was emanating from. What I had first taken to be hideous halitosis that could have been used as a substitute for chloroform, was in fact a general aura that seeped through every crack, crevice and pore. To add to the experience, was a temperament that was even riper than the creatures' smell. They spat, sneezed and bit their way through the journey but I suppose this was small wonder as I would hate to consider what ill feelings I would harbour if I discovered from birth that I smelt like a cross between a freshly laid cow pat and the sweaty matted armpits of a Yak. I have and do continue to ask myself why if they look and smell so bad, they are the animal of choice in these parts. Certainly they are hardy beasts against the scorching heat of the day and the sand but horses do manage to also survive here so I can only assume that a camel steak tastes sublime, though I severely doubt it. Nothing that bad can taste that good.

Lodgings are a little basic but will suffice until I can find a permanent base from which to plan my field trips with an en suite bed and door. A local shopkeeper claims to be a landlord of some properties nearby so I will ask if I can see them tomorrow.

Please thank Auntie for her letter. I look forward to receiving the hamper soon, even though it is uncharacteristically generous of her. I've no doubt that there is an ulterior motive for this and that I will pay for it later but nevertheless, I shall enjoy the scotch and tinned ham whilst I wait.

I hope the old man is well.

All my love.

Jack.

P.S - Two hampers are better than one.